Friday, January 11, 2008

Waiting Over

I didn`t have long to wait this morning before the phone call that I`d been waiting for came. And with it came the news that I hadn`t been selected for the job this time.

Was I disappointed? In lots of ways yes, because I know that it was work that I could have done and would have enjoyed doing; it would have been a help in my home life too. But yet when I came out of the interview yesterday I knew that I`d let myself down, I`d as usual shrunk into my quiet self, I`d become (as so often) tongue-tied and `struck dumb`, and didn`t showing my true abilities. I suppose too that my upbringing, being that one doesn`t talk about oneself, or what I can do still affects me, and I find it very difficult to talk about myself.

Yet, I`m proud of myself that I did have the courage to apply for the job and to go for the interview. My confidence in myself is growing to how its been my whole life. Even a few years ago I wouldn`t have plucked up the courage to even show an interest in the job even though it would be work I could do. And as for going somewhere I`d not been before I would have found all excuses under the sun not to go. So, although I wasn`t successful in being appointed, I feel its another small success for me in confidence building.


Leigh said...

I am sorry you did not get the job. However, gaining confidence is a huge thing!!

Have a wonderful weekend!

Lani said...

Good for you in finding the silver lining and good for you for having the courage to go to the interview. I'm sorry you didn't get the job, but you're attitude about it is beautiful.