Saturday, December 31, 2005

Looking back

It`s the last day of the year, so I`ve been doing a bit of looking back, with a mixture of feelings and emotions.
I`m still single and 99.9% happy to be so, but yet sometimes I wish I`d got a partner, someone to care about me.
I`m still living in the same house as I`ve lived all my life, which in which we had the kitchen and bathroom completely refurbished this year, it was a major upheaval, but well worth it.
I`m still working at the same place, but have cut down my hours so only now do 33 hours a week. It`s lovely and has made a big difference to me.
I`ve come to accept a bit better my mothers` relationship with her man friend than I did at the start of the year, yet at times I still feel a lot of resentment, both for her putting him in my Dad`s place and for the way she always considers him in doing and arranging things, before she considers me and my feelings on them. Yet, in another way it`s a good thing as at least it gives me a few hours to myself each week.
My Church work is still a lifeline to me, having no family of my own this means a lot to me and gives me a purpose and sense of belonging. But I feel that my faith needs to grow more.
My main worry during the year ( and which will continue, I know) is the way my parent is getting older, slower and less able to do things, and I worry that I won`t be able to cope in time to come with that on my own. And having no brothers or sisters to help, it does frighten me at times.

But overall, it`s not been a bad year, just a very ordinary one.

Wonder what 2006 will bring

1 comment:

Rajesh Warrier said...

Happy New Year 06.

Hope for the best and it would all turn out to be good.