Being Watched

Sitting at my office desk yesterday, alone in the office, I got the feeling that I was being watched.   Now, I hasten to add, my office is on the first floor of a buiding, up 17 steps.  There were no workmen working on the building, and we do not have a window cleaner.

I looked across to the big bay window, and at first couldn`t see what was making me feel that someone was watching me.  Then, looking down to the bottom of the left hand side of the bay window, I spotted it.   There, standing with it`s head up tall right against the window peering in from the window ledge was  - a pigeon, looking right at me.

I sat and looked at it, wondering what it was thinking as it stood there looking in.    Did it want to come in?  Did it wonder what I was doing?   Did it wonder what all the things in the room were, so different to its ouside world?   Was it hungry, or looking for somewhere to nest?   What could it actually see, I wondered? 

After quite a few minutes of looking at each other, it flew off, and I went back to my work.   

I wonder if it will come to visit me again?!

A sign of spring

A friend brought me this lovely bunch of tulips yesterday.  Aren`t they a beautiful colour.

I carefully pierced through the stems, just under the flower, with a pin before putting them in the vase as I`m told that helps them to keep up straight and not flop over.   Will see what happens.   It`s working so far.

Black & Blue

I`ve just realised, its a week since I wrote a post here.   I`ve been back to work this week.  I feel better, but you should see the bruises I`ve got on my leg and tummy from where they did the angiogram, which was through the way they have to press so hard for ten minutes after it.    I`m black, blue, purple and all colours - and its painful to move certain ways - but still, never mind the result was good and I know the bruises will disappear in time.

Other than that, I`ve not much to write about, its been a fairy ordinary week.

Day off tomorrow, so maybe I`ll think of something more interesting to say!

Message in the Flowers

I received a nice bunch of daffodils from a friend, when I came home from hospital on Tuesday. 

They were tall and straight and in tight bud.  I put them in a vase with water and stood them where I could see them the most, in the warmth of the room where I was.   Gradually over the last two days they have opened and are now in full bloom.   It`s a real joy to watch how they develop and grow.  Really beautiful.

That set me thinking - how we are like those daffodils.   With warmth and love, care and concern we too grow.  And, best of all is God`s love for us.

Heartfelt Thanks

Well, I`m back home and it`s all over.

And, it`s good news - there`s no problems with my arteries or my heart. They told me the result about 10 minutes after the test when they`d looked at all the x-rays.   I am so relieved

The test wasn`t very pleasant, yet not as bad as I feared. And it all seems to be healing up well where they did it. My friend was able to stay in the nice little single bed ward where they put me both before they did it and as soon as they returned me there from the recovery room. The test took about 30 minutes then after going back from the recovery room I had to lay flat for two and a half hours, then then gradually sat me up during another hour and a half, after which I was allowed to get up and walk around a bit. and we could then ring my other friend to come and collect me. All in all we spent about 8 hours at the hospital!
 
I am so thankful to the kindess of all the nurses and other hospital staff, (I can`t remember  the titles of all their jobs) but they were all so caring and helpful.   And, I`m especially grateful to my friend who stayed with me througout it all.

Test Day.

I`m not looking forward to today.   I`m scared.   I know I`m a coward.

Today I have to go to the hospital to have an angiogram, which is apparently a tube inserted into my groin to then put dye into my heart to see what it happening with the veins and the heart.  

I`m scared and frightened on a number of things, - what are they going to discover?     What is the test going to be/feel like?   and, worst of all - what happens if where they insert it starts bleeding again when I get home?   in some ways that`s my greatest fear.

I am fortunate though, in that I have some good friends - one is taking me to the hospital and staying there, and will stay the night with me when I come home, as I have to have someone with me.    Another good friend is coming to collect me after it`s all over and I can come home.   I`ve just had another friend ring me up to give me good wishes and moral support.

I just wish at this moment that it was tomorrow and that it was all over.

Caught in the Headlights

Feeling a bit better and brighter today, I went over to see my Mum this afternoon and have tea with her. 

Driving back a short time ago in the dark, along the main road my headlights caught on something in the field to my left as I approached a bend.  And what a lovely sight that was.   Something I`d never seen before in all the times that I had driven along that short distance between my Mum`s and my home.

What did I see?   A beautiful pair of deer.  They were standing quite still and close to the edge of the field against the roadside.  It really made my day.

I found myself wondering what they were thinking about as they stood there seemingly watching the constant stream of car headlights passing by!

Moaning Minnie!

I`m still here, but I can`t think of anything to blog about.    You don`t want to keep reading about my health problem I`m sure.   But, at the moment I`m just feeling frightened and alone, and worrying about what is happening to me/my body.   I`ve woken up this morning not feeling "right" but yet not exactly feeling ill, nor  can  I really describe how I feel - its just a feeling of not being right.

Quandry, shall I go to work and hope it wears off, or should I stay at home incase it develops into something.  Maybe its just a reaction to all the tablets I`m now having to take, maybe its the worry of next weeks hospital test, maybe its.......     Oh, I don`t know!